Stage Left Theatre Company, Salida, Colorado
Excerpt from Europa's monologue, Zeus's Women
EUROPA
You know how you sometimes meet someone and they’re not what they appear to be? Well, get this ...
I’m hanging out with some friends on the coast of Phonicia. (I’m eighteen, at the time, maybe nineteen.) We’re eating a light lunch, picking flowers, talking about the new Sophocles that’s playing down at the amphitheater. I didn’t particularly like it, but my friend, Danae, was in love with the actor playing Philoctetes. Anyway, while we’re talking, I notice this bull roaming along the coast. Just walking – peacefully ... purposefully toward us. I was struck by, I don’t know, the beauty this animal possessed. He had downy, chestnut-colored fur and a heavy, regal head. I know I’m going to sound like some sort of sicko, but there was something so ... sexual about him that ... that literally took my breath away. It kinda freaked me out; I mean, I’ve never been attracted to an animal before and I was like “Woah, Europa, get a hold of yourself!”
I don’t know why, but I trusted the situation ... trusted this strange, confident animal that was so out of place, but not ... you know what I mean? So, I approached him, looked into his eyes, and caressed the wiry tuft of hair between his horns. I knew, right then, this was no ordinary bull. It was a god ... incarnate. A god who had chosen me. For what, I didn’t know, but chosen ...me. That – that was the first time I set eyes on Zeus. Well, the rest of the story is so typical it barely needs mention: Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with Girl. Boy disguises himself as a bull to woo Girl. Girl mounts bull. Bull abducts Girl and deposits her in a strange country where she gives birth and becomes a demigod. Blah, blah, blah ...
You know how you sometimes meet someone and they’re not what they appear to be? Well, get this ...
I’m hanging out with some friends on the coast of Phonicia. (I’m eighteen, at the time, maybe nineteen.) We’re eating a light lunch, picking flowers, talking about the new Sophocles that’s playing down at the amphitheater. I didn’t particularly like it, but my friend, Danae, was in love with the actor playing Philoctetes. Anyway, while we’re talking, I notice this bull roaming along the coast. Just walking – peacefully ... purposefully toward us. I was struck by, I don’t know, the beauty this animal possessed. He had downy, chestnut-colored fur and a heavy, regal head. I know I’m going to sound like some sort of sicko, but there was something so ... sexual about him that ... that literally took my breath away. It kinda freaked me out; I mean, I’ve never been attracted to an animal before and I was like “Woah, Europa, get a hold of yourself!”
I don’t know why, but I trusted the situation ... trusted this strange, confident animal that was so out of place, but not ... you know what I mean? So, I approached him, looked into his eyes, and caressed the wiry tuft of hair between his horns. I knew, right then, this was no ordinary bull. It was a god ... incarnate. A god who had chosen me. For what, I didn’t know, but chosen ...me. That – that was the first time I set eyes on Zeus. Well, the rest of the story is so typical it barely needs mention: Boy meets girl. Boy falls in love with Girl. Boy disguises himself as a bull to woo Girl. Girl mounts bull. Bull abducts Girl and deposits her in a strange country where she gives birth and becomes a demigod. Blah, blah, blah ...
Stage Left Theatre Company, Salida, Colorado
Excerpt from Aphrodite's monologue, Zeus's Women
APHRODITE
I was a sophomore at Cytherea High when I began to waken to my own sexuality. It was a Glorious time for me! Unlike the other girls in my class who hid the swell of their new breasts in the folds of a tunic, I wore a form-fitting girdle that was tight to the point of scandal. I walked with the confidence of a woman who knew she was being watched, appreciated. I was the subject of every boy’s fantasy and every girl’s gossip. I knew it and I loved it!
I remember the exact moment I fell in love with my sexuality, too – it was at a skating party at the Athenian Roller Rink. Hermes approached me and asked me to skate “Moonlight Couples” with him. Every immortal looked on in weighty, admiring silence as we held hands and skated to one of those incredibly maudlin songs performed by ... Air Supply or Zamfir. We were a gorgeous couple! People could not take their eyes off of us!
Under the collective gaze of the skaters, we left the rink and walked to this place known as “the rocks,” which was a mound of slate that rose up from the skating rink parking lot and looked down over the Mediterranean. There was a funky, little alcove at the end of “the rocks” where kids stole away to smoke or make out. We trekked there for the latter of those two pastimes, if you hadn’t already guessed.
I remember him moaning, sighing into my mouth, like he had never tasted anything as sweet as my kisses. It made me bold. “Put it in my hand,” I whispered to him. He pretended he didn’t know what I was talking about. So, I reached under his tunic and grabbed his ... manhood.
(Smiling)
For those of you who want to know what power feels like, put a penis in your hand. Seriously. That small appendage in the palm of your hand, tilts the playing field. He would’ve given me the world right then and there simply because I held that strange little thing between my fingers. That, dear friends, was the first time I felt the intoxicating power of passion.
I was a sophomore at Cytherea High when I began to waken to my own sexuality. It was a Glorious time for me! Unlike the other girls in my class who hid the swell of their new breasts in the folds of a tunic, I wore a form-fitting girdle that was tight to the point of scandal. I walked with the confidence of a woman who knew she was being watched, appreciated. I was the subject of every boy’s fantasy and every girl’s gossip. I knew it and I loved it!
I remember the exact moment I fell in love with my sexuality, too – it was at a skating party at the Athenian Roller Rink. Hermes approached me and asked me to skate “Moonlight Couples” with him. Every immortal looked on in weighty, admiring silence as we held hands and skated to one of those incredibly maudlin songs performed by ... Air Supply or Zamfir. We were a gorgeous couple! People could not take their eyes off of us!
Under the collective gaze of the skaters, we left the rink and walked to this place known as “the rocks,” which was a mound of slate that rose up from the skating rink parking lot and looked down over the Mediterranean. There was a funky, little alcove at the end of “the rocks” where kids stole away to smoke or make out. We trekked there for the latter of those two pastimes, if you hadn’t already guessed.
I remember him moaning, sighing into my mouth, like he had never tasted anything as sweet as my kisses. It made me bold. “Put it in my hand,” I whispered to him. He pretended he didn’t know what I was talking about. So, I reached under his tunic and grabbed his ... manhood.
(Smiling)
For those of you who want to know what power feels like, put a penis in your hand. Seriously. That small appendage in the palm of your hand, tilts the playing field. He would’ve given me the world right then and there simply because I held that strange little thing between my fingers. That, dear friends, was the first time I felt the intoxicating power of passion.
Excerpt from Maddie's monologue, Silent Night
MADDIE
Do you know how he proposed to me? Your father. It was on the top of the Eiffel Tower. Well, not the top. What … what do they call it…?
(Thinking)
… the deuxième étage. Yes. The second floor. We’d been dating for six extraordinarily … playful, passionate months before our trip to Paris. It was our first time. To Paris. Both of us. And, we were moved to tears by the city offering itself at our feet. The top of that tower is a lovely, unforgettable thing. Looking down at that perfect design of boulevards and monuments, green spaces and that … snakelike river… it makes you believe in goodness. In God. In something greater than yourself. It made us believe in love, that we were in love, that we would always be in love, and we … cried.
We cried a lot. Not just then. Your father and I. Passionate people are … often moved to tears. We cried when we made love; we cried when we fought; we cried when we were happy. We were criers … are criers, filled with so much fire and life. Fire … and life.
(Lost for a moment before coming to)
Paris. The … Eiffel Tower.
(A brief pause)
After we dried our tears and laughed at each other for being so … maudlin, we went down to the deuxième étage for a bite to eat. Saucisses frites et bières. Hot dogs, fries, and beer. We went halfway around the world to the most romantic spot on earth and ate something we could’ve gotten at any ballpark. It made us … giddy to do something so simple and familiar in a place so foreign and sexy ...
(She laughs)
Saucisses frites. Even hot dogs sound more beautiful in French.
(A beat)
That’s when he proposed.
Do you know how he proposed to me? Your father. It was on the top of the Eiffel Tower. Well, not the top. What … what do they call it…?
(Thinking)
… the deuxième étage. Yes. The second floor. We’d been dating for six extraordinarily … playful, passionate months before our trip to Paris. It was our first time. To Paris. Both of us. And, we were moved to tears by the city offering itself at our feet. The top of that tower is a lovely, unforgettable thing. Looking down at that perfect design of boulevards and monuments, green spaces and that … snakelike river… it makes you believe in goodness. In God. In something greater than yourself. It made us believe in love, that we were in love, that we would always be in love, and we … cried.
We cried a lot. Not just then. Your father and I. Passionate people are … often moved to tears. We cried when we made love; we cried when we fought; we cried when we were happy. We were criers … are criers, filled with so much fire and life. Fire … and life.
(Lost for a moment before coming to)
Paris. The … Eiffel Tower.
(A brief pause)
After we dried our tears and laughed at each other for being so … maudlin, we went down to the deuxième étage for a bite to eat. Saucisses frites et bières. Hot dogs, fries, and beer. We went halfway around the world to the most romantic spot on earth and ate something we could’ve gotten at any ballpark. It made us … giddy to do something so simple and familiar in a place so foreign and sexy ...
(She laughs)
Saucisses frites. Even hot dogs sound more beautiful in French.
(A beat)
That’s when he proposed.
